Me: (cutting up a salad) Robert: I think I want to take you out. Me: Uhhh... do you mean for lunch, or are you planning to kill me? Robert: I haven't decided yet.
Robert: What are you doing? Me (sitting in dining room): I'm on hold with the insurance company about that EOB they sent us. Would you like to take a turn? Robert: I would, but you are much better... Continue Reading →
Me: I was quite proud of the MSO's performance of Les Éolides last Sunday. That was a very difficult piece to put together. Robert: It would have been much easier if the music hadn't been such a mess. Why... Continue Reading →
Robert: What happened? You're almost never home from work before midnight. Me: I just couldn't stay there anymore. I hit a proverbial wall this evening. I know people mean well, but I can't bear to hear about God closing doors... Continue Reading →
Background -- sometimes musicians refer to woodwinds simply as "winds," which can be a little confusing because technically brass instruments are also "winds." I normally use the term "winds" to mean both woodwinds and brass, but this is not universal... Continue Reading →
Robert (to teenager at drive-thru window): May I have some ketchup please? Teenager: Of course. Is this enough? (Gives him a handful of ketchup packets, one of which lands on his forearm and promptly falls to the ground outside the... Continue Reading →
Robert: You know, you have an abnormally low threshold for tolerating inefficiency, impracticality, and general dumb-assery. I'm taking this as a compliment, just sayin'.
Background Info: In a house full of women, I learned a long time ago to hook all the bras before putting them in the wash to prevent them from snagging other items in the laundry. Me: Strange. Our new washing... Continue Reading →
Me: (happily unloading groceries, proud of myself for coming home early enough to interact with Robert and help with some chores he normally completes uncomplaining and alone) Robert: (squeezing past me in the pantry doorway) *sigh* Me: (unloading more groceries... Continue Reading →
(Dinner conversation -- while I was eating something involving salsa) Robert: I am really enjoying this book I'm reading. Me: Let me guess: historical fiction? or perhaps music history? Robert: Mid-to-Late 18th Century Viennese Music History. Me: Wow, that's pretty... Continue Reading →
So... today, I had new shoes on with more heel than I normally wear (a towering 1.5 inches, mind you). I opened a cabinet in the kitchen and whacked myself in the head with the door, because it usually swings... Continue Reading →
PSA: Be sure to choose as your partner in life, someone who will notice your shirt is inside out before you walk out the door and head for the office. Some things are more important than fame, wealth, or power,... Continue Reading →
This morning, I was deeply sleeping off a rather gnarly night of composing, when I was awakened by the following... Robert: What are you doing? Why are you lying there like a sack of potatoes? If you think you look... Continue Reading →
Me: (starting to wake up a little) Hildegard the Cat: (tucks herself under my chin for our usual a.m. snuggle time) Prrrrrrrrrr Prrrrrrrrr (etc, ad libitum....) Me: Well, good morning, sweetie. Ella the Cat: (at point blank range, poking me... Continue Reading →
Preface - Sometimes I forget I married a person who never got into pop music. I kid you not, the first record he bought as an adolescent was a Beethoven Symphony. He's heard of The Beatles, but he can't tell... Continue Reading →
I was awakened from a nap on the couch when Robert popped a movie into the DVD player. My glasses were off so I couldn't see anything, but I knew the film from the first couple of chords in the... Continue Reading →
Bethany: (offering up her usual morning report) Today is Thursday and tomorrow is Friday. I get to see Grandpa on Friday! Me: Sorry, Babe - but today is Wednesday. Bethany: (pointing at kitchen calendar) No, Mom! Today is Thursday. It... Continue Reading →
Episode #1: (setting -- 2-day roadtrip) Me: Oh, by the way, we need to make a quick stop so I can buy some underwear. Robert: What? Why? Me: I threw out most of my old underpants so I would remember... Continue Reading →
McD's employee at drive-thru window: "Here's your food. I'm sorry about your wait." Me: "I'm sorry about it too, but I intend to eat this anyway." Get it? Wait/weight....yeah, it blew right past her. #whennobodygetsyourhumor
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