Bethany: (offering up her usual morning report) Today is Thursday and tomorrow is Friday. I get to see Grandpa on Friday! Me: Sorry, Babe - but today is Wednesday. Bethany: (pointing at kitchen calendar) No, Mom! Today is Thursday. It... Continue Reading →
Episode #1: (setting -- 2-day roadtrip) Me: Oh, by the way, we need to make a quick stop so I can buy some underwear. Robert: What? Why? Me: I threw out most of my old underpants so I would remember... Continue Reading →
McD's employee at drive-thru window: "Here's your food. I'm sorry about your wait." Me: "I'm sorry about it too, but I intend to eat this anyway." Get it? Wait/weight....yeah, it blew right past her. #whennobodygetsyourhumor
Robert and I often confer on repertoire selection for the MSO. There is much to consider, but of course audience enjoyment weighs heavily. Me: We need to draw in more young people, but they don't always have the attention span... Continue Reading →
There's a wasp in my office. I know he's going to die in here, so I feel sad about that. He whacks himself against the glass window in desperation and then takes little exhausted respites. I start feeling sorry for... Continue Reading →
Day four of complete covid isolation. Robert just asked if he could bring me something to read. This is the bookshelf in my room. Let's see - at first glance we've got Ibsen plays, The Tao of Pooh, the Quran,... Continue Reading →
Prologue/Covid Update: I have been in my room since Friday morning, except for masked trips to the bathroom. Emily has a major opera gig coming up in July and I'm not about to risk getting her sick - so, here... Continue Reading →
Robert: If Jesus smoked, what brand d'ya think he would choose? Me: Nobody smoked back then, did they? That started like 1,000 years later, right? Robert: Well, supposing he was a smoker, what brand? Me: Hmmmm he lived on roots... Continue Reading →
Bless Robert for helping me laugh at my own baggage.
Sometimes Robert and I have to speak in code when we want to surprise Bethany with a special treat. She never misses anything! Robert planned to pick up some of her favorite carry-out for supper, so this was our conversation... Continue Reading →
Practicing cello-piano duets. Robert: [stops mid-phrase to erase an old marking in his music] I've decided against portato bowing there. Me: Well, it's like the song says, "You say Portato, I say Portayto..." Robert: No, no. It's "You say Portato,... Continue Reading →
Sight-reading through cello-piano possibilities for an upcoming memorial service. Next up is a sparse, jazzy, transparent little arrangement of "Wondrous Love." Robert: (listens to piano intro... makes weird face... glares at me over his reading glasses) We don't have time... Continue Reading →
Me: It's pretty unsettling when Facebook algorithms start sending Depends ads my way. Robert: (unsympathetically) Well, every time I order bras for you and Bethany... Sorry, buddy.
A few weeks ago, Hero Robert noticed the threadbare state of my bra inventory and took it upon himself to order replacements for everything in that drawer, knowing I would never get around to doing it myself. So, today... Robert:... Continue Reading →
...Then there's that moment when your tummy-sleeping self is ready to get out of bed and start your day, except that there's a cat sleeping on your butt and you are hesitant to inconvenience her by moving. #itsverywarmtoo
Me: (arrives home at 11-ish p.m. to eat supper before heading back to the office) Robert: (glancing up from the T.V.) How was rehearsal? Me: Rehearsal was good. I'm loving the show. But, I'm mired in peripherals. Robert: Oh? (eyes... Continue Reading →
I am a Driskell, which means throwing garbage into its designated receptacle is always done from where you are at the time the item becomes disposable. One does not approach said receptacle. Oh no! If you are a football field... Continue Reading →
Text message thread between me and my daughter Emily. Me: We start three days of juries tomorrow. Fun times! It's better than grading papers... mayyyybe. Although, I can grade papers in my pajamas, so there's that. Emily: Truuuue. And you... Continue Reading →
Me: (starts telling a story to Robert, but falls asleep mid-sentence) Me: (two hours later, waking up from nap) "...and then..." (continues story from the exact point where snoring began earlier) Robert: (shakes head, chuckling) "How the heck do you... Continue Reading →
Robert: (loading the dishwasher) I knew I should've done this yesterday. I can't fit everything in here now. (Frustrated there's no spot for one last plate) Me: Just put that one behind the other plates. Robert: I can't do that!... Continue Reading →
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