• Robert: “What is it with cats? They crawl onto your lap and slap at you when they want to be petted or get a belly rub. And what do we do? We pet them – after they slap us! If I crawled onto your lap and batted at your face, you’d tell me to take a hike!”

  • Me: “True. [pinching his cheeks and baby-talking] But, if your nose was pink and your ears sat perkily atop your little head, I would rub your tummy all day long.”

Strangely, I haven’t seen him for the past couple of hours.